Couples

We all need to be heard and understood but with a reactive or silent partner this appears impossible for either. The question that seems so difficult to answer is often, “How do I communicate, listen, understand or move into my partner’s space, without losing myself in the process? What about me? I am also in pain!   Initially the counselling process is about experiencing a dialogue that de-escalates conflict, through a process and technique that encourages differentiation or keeping my sense of who I am while still being present for another.   Couple’s are encouraged to experience understanding and being understood by stepping into their partner’s world. As couple's share their individual stories, understanding is gained of how unmet needs and learnt childhood patterns continue to impact on current relationships with both partners and friends. Empathy is able to grow as understanding is gained without the expectation that 'my partner must fix me' or 'I need to fix them'.   Being present to the other is about listening, reflecting and communicating what/where you are and what/where I am with understanding and support rather than expectation, conflict, disagreement, judgement, anger, fear, depression or abandonment.   “Millions of people are suffering: they want to be loved but they don't know how to love. And love cannot exist as a monologue; it is a dialogue, a very harmonious dialogue.” Osho (Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh).